Temperament Therapy is offered at Margie Negri Christian Family Counseling:
Our inborn temperament is placed within us by God while we are in our mother's womb.
This temperament will remain with us throughout our lives. How we do (or do not) express
this temperament can be affected by the following:
• Our upbringing (how we were raised as children)
• Our environment
• Our education and training
• By the work of the Holy Spirit in our lives
Temperament determines how we interact with our environment and the people around us.
Temperament also determines our perception and understanding of ourselves and of the
people who love us.
Sometimes A Mask
Sometimes a person can learn or select behavior that is very different from their inborn
temperament. This mask hides the true temperament. As a result this person's
temperament needs are not met, and he/she feels stress and conflict.
Our Conflicts...
Every person is unique and has different temperament needs. When we attempt to get
these needs met apart from our relationship with God, we have conflict in our lives. These
conflicts are caused by:
• Trying to get our needs met apart from God's plan for our lives.
• Not getting certain needs met because we are spending all our energy meeting
some needs while ignoring others.
• Reacting in a negative (angry, frustrated) way to unmet temperament needs.
Strengths and Weaknesses
Every temperament has strengths and weaknesses. The description of your temperament
will include strengths and weaknesses which are usually demonstrated in someone who had
your temperament profile. This does not mean that you personally show these strengths
and weaknesses in your individual, unique life. It does show you some of the areas of
strengths that can be encouraged as well as some areas of weaknesses that you can be
aware of.
Three Areas of Temperament
The three areas of temperament are as follows:
1. Inclusion - the need to establish and maintain a satisfactory relationship with
people in the area of surface relationships, associations and socialization (parties,
social gatherings, and people who come in and out of our lives every day).
◦ How many people do I approach for socializing?
◦ How many people do I want to approach me for socializing?
2. Control - the need to establish and maintain a satisfactory relationship with people in respect to issues of control and power.
◦ How many people do I want to control?
◦ How many people will I allow to control me?
3. Affection - the need to establish and maintain a satisfactory relationship with others in
regard to love and affection (deep one-on-one relationships such as spouses,
girlfriends or boyfriends, parents, children, and trusted friends).
◦ How much love and affection do I express to others?
◦ How much love and affection do I want expressed to me?
Things To Remember
As you read or discuss your profile, it is critical to remember That this is a general diagnosis
and not a specific interpretation of your life or behavior. It is valuable because it will help
you discover the strengths you may develop as well as the weaknesses you may resist. It
will also reveal unmet needs that can cause stress and conflict in your life and your relationships with others. It is difficult to consider possible weaknesses in our lives, but if
we are open to change, understanding our weaknesses can help us resolve conflicts and
improve our relationships with loved ones.
Our inborn temperament is placed within us by God while we are in our mother's womb.
This temperament will remain with us throughout our lives. How we do (or do not) express
this temperament can be affected by the following:
• Our upbringing (how we were raised as children)
• Our environment
• Our education and training
• By the work of the Holy Spirit in our lives
Temperament determines how we interact with our environment and the people around us.
Temperament also determines our perception and understanding of ourselves and of the
people who love us.
Sometimes A Mask
Sometimes a person can learn or select behavior that is very different from their inborn
temperament. This mask hides the true temperament. As a result this person's
temperament needs are not met, and he/she feels stress and conflict.
Our Conflicts...
Every person is unique and has different temperament needs. When we attempt to get
these needs met apart from our relationship with God, we have conflict in our lives. These
conflicts are caused by:
• Trying to get our needs met apart from God's plan for our lives.
• Not getting certain needs met because we are spending all our energy meeting
some needs while ignoring others.
• Reacting in a negative (angry, frustrated) way to unmet temperament needs.
Strengths and Weaknesses
Every temperament has strengths and weaknesses. The description of your temperament
will include strengths and weaknesses which are usually demonstrated in someone who had
your temperament profile. This does not mean that you personally show these strengths
and weaknesses in your individual, unique life. It does show you some of the areas of
strengths that can be encouraged as well as some areas of weaknesses that you can be
aware of.
Three Areas of Temperament
The three areas of temperament are as follows:
1. Inclusion - the need to establish and maintain a satisfactory relationship with
people in the area of surface relationships, associations and socialization (parties,
social gatherings, and people who come in and out of our lives every day).
◦ How many people do I approach for socializing?
◦ How many people do I want to approach me for socializing?
2. Control - the need to establish and maintain a satisfactory relationship with people in respect to issues of control and power.
◦ How many people do I want to control?
◦ How many people will I allow to control me?
3. Affection - the need to establish and maintain a satisfactory relationship with others in
regard to love and affection (deep one-on-one relationships such as spouses,
girlfriends or boyfriends, parents, children, and trusted friends).
◦ How much love and affection do I express to others?
◦ How much love and affection do I want expressed to me?
Things To Remember
As you read or discuss your profile, it is critical to remember That this is a general diagnosis
and not a specific interpretation of your life or behavior. It is valuable because it will help
you discover the strengths you may develop as well as the weaknesses you may resist. It
will also reveal unmet needs that can cause stress and conflict in your life and your relationships with others. It is difficult to consider possible weaknesses in our lives, but if
we are open to change, understanding our weaknesses can help us resolve conflicts and
improve our relationships with loved ones.